Christmas is over- now what?!

Christmas is over – now what?!

Now we have Christmas done, dusted and out of the way for another year there is often a great temptation to start scurrying around trying to make elaborate plans for the new year. For chucking out everything you don’t need, and trying to embrace healthy eating diets and new rigorous exercise plans.

Now whilst I’m not saying that it’s a bad idea to start doing new things at this time of year, I would like to encourage you to take a deep breath, rest for a while and regather your strength first.

December is often a very busy month, with a stream of parties, social events, carol services, catch ups with friends and a frenzy of shopping. This can easily leave you frazzled in a heap if you’re not careful. So probably not the best time of year to start making big, big changes in your life.

Image of a ludo game with a yellow game board

Give yourself some headspace and time to deeply rest

Christmas can also be an emotional time for many people, and it can be really intense spending time with friends and relatives you may not be used to spending a lot of time with. You may have had to make compromises on how you spend your time or who you’ve gone to visit. Or maybe you would have liked to have spent time with someone you’ve not got to spend time with, and this also takes its toll. So just for a few days give yourself permission to take some time out to deeply recharge your own batteries.

This could include going for walks on your own, stopping off for a hot chocolate to warm up afterwards. Or taking yourself to the beach or for a swim or just to have some time out in nature. Or maybe you’d prefer to curl up under a blanket or duvet on the sofa and just sink into the warmth and cosiness that that brings. Or you might like to have a long afternoon nap or put on a good movie in front of the fire.

Maybe make some homemade soup, bake some cakes, drink a few pots of tea, read a book or magazine. Or simply do nothing. Just for 20 mins or just for an hour! You don’t have to be constantly ‘doing something’ sometimes its ok to do absolutely nothing for a while.

Play a few board games with the family. Do some journaling. Do some art. Luxuriate in having time to do things slowly. Maybe pour yourself a mid-afternoon bath, or give yourself a facial. There are loads of low-energy things you could do as you allow yourself to recharge.

Once you’ve managed to come up for air reflect back on what went well this year, what could have gone better and only then start making plans for what you’d like next year to look like!

Related post

https://www.sarahcooper.co.uk/how-to-have-a-happy-and-healthy-new-year/

12 Little things that changed my life

Thoughts

Here are 12 little things that changed my life.

I used to believe that in order to change my life I would have to ‘do something’ fairly elaborate. But the more I thought about it the more I realised that I’d already made some significant changes to my life, not through elaborate gestures and giving up chocolate but by doing a fairly bijou series of little things to tweak my lifestyle, mindset and daily routine.

As ever I thought they may be useful to other people hence why I’m sharing them with you now.

If you find them useful please feel free to share this post with your friends

things that changed my life. image of a good breakfast

Having a good breakfast within an hour of waking up

Those of you who know me well know that I’m not a morning person and so breakfast is something that I’ve struggled with in the past.

I’ve spent way too many years skipping breakfast in favour of some form of caffeine replenishment therapy – a.k.a a pot of coffee and then nothing to eat until mid morning. (I know, I know!)

But then I read an article which said that having breakfast – and the right kind of breakfast- within the first hour or two after we wake up would set us up for the day and help rebalance our hormones.

So I gave it a go and found that eating something rich in protein within that first hour made all the difference. I found that I wasn’t needing a mid-morning biscuit break, my energy levels where higher and I was more able to focus.

things that changed my life, image of woman on sofa thinking with a peachy background

Tuning in to what made my body / gut feel better

Going back to the idea of having breakfast (or not as the case may be!) I realised that the cereal and toast type ‘traditional’ breakfast had left me feeling either a bit light headed or downright hungry by 9.30 am (sometimes both!) whereas something a bit more substantial made me feel better.

The more I thought about this the more I realised that there were other patterns to things that I ate that either left me with a low mood, feeling sluggish or feeling way better, depending what they were.

So I started to make a point of really tuning in to what my body needed and what it wanted less of. I realised that bread based things don’t make me feel great unless they were the less processed kind.

Things like salmon and brazil nuts made me feel good as did chicken thighs and butter – but things like low fat margarine, low fat yoghurts, low calorie pop, and anything with artificial sweeteners just made me feel downright ill.

I found having a little supper stopped me from waking up in the wee small hours and for some reason having a bigger cup of tea made me sleep better than having the small one (presumably with concentrated caffeine!)

So it was all about just noticing what was working and what wasn’t and doing more of the things that made me feel good and avoiding anything that didn’t!

After I’d made a point of noticing what food and drinks made me feel good I started thinking about what my body needed.

It turned out it sometimes needed to rest and other times it needed exercise.

Other days it just needed a big heartfelt hug from a friend.

Having regular reflexology helped enormously to help keep my stress levels at a manageable level too.

things that changed my life listen to your intuition. Image of woman on peachy background listening to her intuition

Started listening to my Intuition

There have been many times when I’ve instinctively known what to do but chosen to ignore that instinct to my peril – like the day that I had the thought to go find my breakdown cover card, have a wee and buy a hot chocolate at a petrol station.

Only to find that within 20 mins of having this thought I was broken down at the roadside, desperate for the loo and craving a hot chocolate. I know know that if I have a thought it is worth acting on that thought, even if at the time it doesn’t make any sense!

things that changed my life image of woman holding placard saying perfectly imperfect

Let go of the need for perfectionism.

For many years I wanted to be perfect and this was so limiting as at the end of the day none of us are (thankfully!) I thought that in order to be loveable I would need to be good at everything, have all the answers and not have any personal flaws.

It was an impossible brief to keep to and one that left me with terribly low self-esteem for a long long time! In fact it delayed me starting my business for many years as I was so afraid that someone would ask me a question I didn’t know how to answer (I’ve since learned that most people are happy with my answer of ‘I will get back to you on that!’ if I’m not sure. I’ve also learned that the right people will love you because of your imperfections – just as I love other people exactly as they are!

I’ve also realised that if I just approach life with a sense of ‘I wonder what would happen if..’ and a sense of playfulness life is a load more fun and way less daunting. So now I feel able to try new things without needing to be an expert immediately etc

things that changed my life speak kindly to yourself. image of pink parrot on peachy background

Learned to Speak kindly to myself and set myself a series of mini dares

I realised that I was constantly having a go at myself, telling myself off for the least little misdemeanour. It took a while and a lot of practice but I’ve since learned to speak kindly to myself (most of the time) and to see the lessons that I can learn from situations that haven’t quite gone according to plan rather than berating myself for not doing better.

My eldest daughter is constantly saying to me ‘you’re doing your best’ and so now my inner voice is more likely to tell me that I’m doing my best than that I’m an idiot for not doing better!

If you’re too scared to do something just dare yourself to do it with no set outcome. So if you want to ask someone for a coffee for instance just ask (that being the dare) – they may say yes or they may say no, that doesn’t matter, the bit that matters is that you dared to ask!

Read my article on Improving your self-esteem
https://www.sarahcooper.co.uk/easy-ways-to-improve-your-self-esteem/

Things that changed my life do those things you've been avoiding image of toad on pink background

Tackled those things I’d been avoiding

Do you have a task that you’ve been putting off doing, a conversation that you’ve avoided having or maybe you really want to resign your job but haven’t quite got around to it yet?

If it’s causing you stress and hassle it can be useful to simply do that task or have that chat now so it’s done and you don’t have to think about it any more.

We can make it bigger in our heads than it actually is. Once it’s done we can get on with the rest of the day in peace.

Journal Prompt
Ask yourself ‘what am I avoiding?’

things that changed my life surround yourself by the right people

Surrounded myself with the right people.

I used to spend a lot of time surrounded by people who I couldn’t be my authentic (if slightly bonkers) self with. Having to edit yourself to fit in with how someone else wants you to be is exhausting.

In the end I broke away and found people who are heading in the same direction as me, have shared values and interests and who are generally encouraging, loving and constructive.

things that changed my life image of stormy sea with big waves

Changed expectations of how life was going to be

For years I expected life to be constantly smooth with no bumpy bits – once I changed my expectations my life got way better. I know that whilst there are bumpy times in life generally everything sorts itself out eventually and then calm is restored.

I also realised that I’m stronger than I gave myself credit for and that I too can do hard things!

Things that changed my life cross that bridge when you come to it image of bridge

Crossed that bridge when I came to it!

My key piece of advice to all my children is to ‘cross that bridge when you come to it’ In other words only deal with actual situations that arise rather than conjuring up some worst case scenario along with dire consequences out of some imagined event.

Especially as about 90% of everything we worry about never actually happens!

If you have a journal flick back through the pages note what you were worrying about this time last year (or even this time last week) chances are it all resolved itself nicely or didn’t actually happen in the end!

thngs that changed my life work out how much time things take image of man with hoover on pink background

Worked out how much time things actually take!

For some unknown reason I always assumed that vacuuming the house was going to take hours (if not days!) to do! When in fact it takes about 20 minutes tops. Ditto mowing the lawn.

If you don’t know how long things are going to take you’ll not get around to doing them as you’re going to think it will take way longer than it will.

So if you work out the facts of the matter you can simply slot short activities like vacuuming the house or mowing the lawn into those small gaps rather than thinking you have to put 3-4 working days to one side to do a simple task!

Things that changed my life curated time with phone image of phone with christmas stuff

Set boundaries with my phone use

One of the key little things that made a difference to my life was setting strict boundaries for my phone.

I stopped taking it upstairs overnight so I couldn’t be stressing over a work email at 4 in the morning when I came back from the loo. I found that there are focus modes on my latest phone so if I want to concentrate I can pop it on one of the focus modes.

I also try not to have it out when out with friends (apart from to take a photo or three)

I also put it on silent for much of the time – so I don’t have lots of notifications binging at me at all hours. Occasionally I go for a walk without it so that I can simply focus on what I’m experiencing rather than stopping every 3 ft to take a photo of something else!

Further Reading https://www.sarahcooper.co.uk/confession-time-why-i-was-struggling-to-get-a-good-nights-sleep/

Things that changed my life set my alarm not to come on on the hour image of alarm clock on pink background

Stopped setting radio alarm to come on on the hour!

I hit on the idea that if I set my radio alarm to come on on the hour I wake up each day to the news. And as we all know they rarely speak of good news.

So if you want to start your day in a more positive way, set it so it doesn’t come on on the hour!

Over to you! What little things have changed your life?

Easy ways to improve your self-esteem

Mind Body Spirit

What is self-esteem and how do you improve it?

Self-esteem is the views and opinions you have of yourself. You may hold yourself in high regard, knowing that you’ve got your strengths and challenges but essentially you like yourself.

Or maybe you have poor self-esteem and live life in a self-critical state constantly berating yourself for each little hiccup.

Maybe you flitter between the two, at times being able to praise yourself for your efforts and for how well something went whilst sometimes telling yourself off for not being braver, for not daring to try something or beating yourself up for something you’ve said or done (that perhaps you shouldn’t have said or done!)

If you have good self-esteem you’re more likely to be happy to try new things, and are more resilient when things don’t go well whilst being able to speak kindly to yourself about how well you’ve done just giving something a go.

Those people who have been raised in a positive environment where praise is profuse and easily earned are probably more likely to have good self-esteem, whereas if you’ve been raised in a family who nit-pick and where praise isn’t easy to come by, you may end up with poor self-esteem. But that can be improved!

It’s useful to note that your own positive opinion of yourself is all that matters, you don’t have to wait for someone else to give you validation or tell you that you’re amazing and you don’t need to be perfect in order to add value to the world or to be loveable. You’re amazing just as you are. Honestly.

Here are some easy ways to improve your self-esteem

how to improve your self esteem see yourself with kind eyes. Image of woman wearing rose tinted glasses on a blue background

See yourself through kind eyes and speak nicely to yourself

The quickest way to raise your self-esteem is to start seeing yourself through kind eyes.

If something goes wrong know that you have tried your best. Instead of beating yourself up by telling yourself you’re an absolute wally you are (or worse!) look for the lessons it’s taught you, think about what you’d do differently next time and tell yourself that you did your best. If you see ‘failure’ as a learning experience you will feel much better!

We don’t need to get everything right 100% of the time. Forgive yourself for any mistakes you may have made. Let it go. It’s also important to challenge any negative beliefs. Sometimes we think things that just aren’t true or that may have been true at one point, but aren’t true now. Consider if someone else had done this, would you think less of them or would you smile and think nothing more of it? Treat yourself in the same way you’d treat others.

Use words of encouragement on yourself. Things like ‘you can do this’ or ‘let’s see what happens’ are powerful ways of boosting your self-esteem Top Tip: If you wouldn’t say what you’re thinking about yourself to a small child, don’t say it to yourself!

improve your self-esteem dare to give it a go image of woman jumping

Dare yourself to give it a go – be playful Be playful!

Dare yourself to try new things and let go of the need for a specific outcome.

See what happens. Allow it to play out. If you feel like you always need to get every job you apply for, pass every exam with distinction first time, be accepted onto every course or be accepted on a date by everyone you ask, you’ll find it too hard to do anything. So let go of a specific outcome and see what happens.

Usually you’ll find that the more you try new things with no specific outcome in mind, the better you feel about yourself and the more confident you get! If you take a more playful attitude it won’t matter if you get a no, don’t get the job, don’t go on the date etc.

The same principle applies to projects you might want to start, if you feel like you need to be absolutely 100% ready or it has to be the right time or perfect before you release it into the world, you’ll never do it. So just give it a go, see what happens and you can always adjust what you do when you’ve got more information! Be brave – I dare you!

improve your self esteem by celebrating everything image of woman looking happy on blue background

Recognise/ Celebrate what you CAN do.

Sometimes we brush off what we can do or what we have achieved. It can help to list all the things that you can do, that you’re good at and things that you’ve overcome. Praise yourself and celebrate every little achievement. If anyone compliments you on anything, make note of it and then when you’re having a bad day you can look at what other people have said and know that you’re just having a bad day rather than a bad life! Remember that you’ve got many talents and have plenty to offer the world, even if it doesn’t always feel that way!

Read Blog post about What CAN you do

improve your self esteem don't compare yourself to others image of book saying don't compare yourself to others on blue background

Never compare yourself to others

We can sometimes look at other people and decide that they’re doing way better than we are. But it’s important to remember we only see the bits of people’s lives they want us to see.

We don’t see the sleepless nights, the worries about paying bills, the arguments, the mound of washing stacked up, the pile of pots on the work top.

Also we’re not climbing the same tree as anyone else. Many years ago I was happily moaning about how my life wasn’t going as well as someone else’s and it was pointed out to me that we weren’t climbing the same tree. That their life may have had some easy to climb branches lower down where as my tree may be easier to climb further up and that really stuck with me.

If i was comparing my life to someone else’s I may find my life lacking but if i compare myself with how I was say 5 or 10 years ago then I’m doing really well. So pack it in!

Don’t compare yourself to anyone else’s illusion of a perfect life! Top Tip: Know that other people struggle too! With practice you can get better at most things. Don’t feel that you have to ‘be a natural’ at anything in order to be good at it.

improving self esteem if it's not a heck yes it's a no image of man thinking on blue background

Set Boundaries – If it’s not a heck yes it’s a no!

You can improve your self-esteem by setting boundaries and knowing your value. Prioritise things that make your heart sing and curate your time wisely. If you get asked to do something and your immediate response isn’t ‘heck yes’ then decline and do something else.

People will respect you more if you don’t always do everything you’re asked to do and the higher your self-esteem will be.

If something makes you feel uncomfortable (and it’s something you can get out of, not say completing your tax return!) then feel free to decline.

Further Reading: https://www.sarahcooper.co.uk/what-is-self-love/

Over to you.

What do you to to improve your self-esteem? Please let me know in the comments below. If you have enjoyed this article please share with your friends.

Quick and Easy Ways to Lift Low Mood

Mind Body Spirit

Are you looking for some quick and easy ways to lift low mood?

If you find yourself having a down day here are a few of my favourite ways to help

It can be helpful to remember that we all have days when we’re feeling a bit ‘meh’ and this is completely normal. It’s not realistic to expect to be happy, cheerful and on top form 365 days a year! (That said, if you ARE happy, cheerful and on top form 365 days a year that’s ok too!)

Disclaimer: This should not be seen as a replacement for medical advice so if you have a consistently low mood or feel you’re at risk to yourself or others please get in touch with your GP

How to lift low mood eat protein rich breakfast

Set yourself up for the day with a protein-rich breakfast

If you’re feeling anxious as well as having low mood, you may feel better if you start the day with a high-protein breakfast instead of just toast or cereal. This will help stabilise your blood sugars, keep you fuller for longer and give you a bit of power in your belly (quite literally!)

Try to include plenty of good quality protein in your other meals too. Often we feel better when we’ve had a good nutritious meal. Add in some fruit or vegetables or a glass of juice to help you get your 5 a day.

lift low mood by listening to uplifting music. Image of sunset with person in yellow coat listening to music via headphones

Listen to uplifting music

A really quick way to lift low mood is to listen to uplifting music. Whether this is a Housework playlist on Spotify, an album of rousing classical music or another genre you love, put on some lively tunes and turn the volume up a little bit (not too loud!)

If you feel the urge you could dance along to your favourite tunes too, another great mood lifter!

How to lift low mood image of woman holding tv remote and laughing. The woman has long brown hair and is cupping her chin in her left hand

Watch something funny on TV

Find a good comedy film or show to watch on tv and have a good belly laugh. I find things like Friday Night Dinner on Channel 4 really easy to watch and very funny.

Alternatively take yourself to the cinema for the afternoon, even if you go alone. There’s something fabulously naughty about sneaking off to the cinema on your own, especially on a weekday afternoon when the rest of the world is at work!

How to lift low mood declutter something, Image of woman with lots of clutter in a white room

Keep Busy

Distraction can be key to lifting low mood. So either absorb yourself in one of your hobbies, tackle that job you’ve been putting off, declutter something or deep clean part of your home!

Rehome anything you don’t love any more and repurpose things that you do love! Having a clean, organised, clutter-free environment can be be a great help

Lift low mood by making rissotto. Image of a bowl of rissotto

Make Risotto, Soup or Fruit Salad

The beauty of doing this is you get to eat something delicious when you’ve finished.

There is something wonderfully uplifting chopping vegetables into small even pieces, and stirring either a soup or a risotto!

As you really have to focus on what you’re doing you find that your mind starts to unwind and your mood should start to lift a little bit.

lift low mood by wearing make up image of lipsticks on a pink background

Get showered, wash your hair and get dressed

Have a long hot shower, wash your hair, maybe style it or blow dry it, apply make up if that’s something you enjoy and put some nice clothes on. Just looking good and feeling fresh can be a really quick and easy way to lift low mood.

Sometimes it feels too difficult to get up and dressed but if you possibly can it can help you feel better. If doing all the above feels like too much you could always pick one element. Like washing your face or brushing your hair or even squirting on some of your favourite perfume. Anything to give you a lift.

Lift low mood by setting a timer. Image of rose gold timer set to 25 mins

Set a timer for 25 minutes

There are two ways you can do this. Either set a timer for 25 minutes and sit with how you’re feeling for the 25 minutes and then get up and do something.

Or you can set the timer for 25 minutes and start doing something like a job you’ve been putting off and then once the timer goes off you can decide whether you’d like to take a break or whether you’re in the flow and want to continue.

Think about your past experience

Have you felt like this before? If so think back to what happened last time. Chances are it will have all worked out really well.

Your argument with your loved one will have resolved itself in some way or you’ll have found that new house, car or job. Feel reassured that generally things work out in the end.

Hug Someone

Having a hug or a cuddle can work wonders for low mood. It needs to be a heartfelt hug which lasts for at least 20 seconds so that oxytocin can start to be released. If you have no one to cuddle try hugging a soft toy or a pillow for a few minutes.

Log out of social media for a few hours

There’s nothing worse than feeling a bit low and having your phone keep telling you how great everyone else’s life seems to be going. (It probably isn’t going that well for them either, but it can be very annoying if it looks like everyone is having a very flashy, glossy, life when you’re feeling a bit low)

So if possible either switch your phone off, log out of social media apps or put it on silent for a few hours. If you have young children or caring responsibilities you may not be able to do this but where possible try to disconnect from the artificial world in your pocket for a few hours and see if that helps!

Lift low mood visit somewhere new, image of ruined abbey on a blue sky background

Have a one day mini-holiday!

If you have time try going somewhere completely new. This could be to a new town or village, a new beach or to a local tourist attraction that you’ve seen nearby.

It could be as simple as parking at the other end of town and exploring what you find there. Just take your time, take photos if you like or go armed with your sketch book and watercolours and enjoy doing some artwork. Maybe stop off afterwards at their cafe or a local nearby coffee shop for a cup of tea and a fresh scone.

Having a little fresh air and exercise can do you the power of good.

Top Tip

If you prefer fresh air and old buildings to stuffy gyms consider getting a National Trust or English Heritage Membership or look out for other similar passes so you can pay once and enjoy exploring for little or no extra additional cost. It can be worth reading the handbook that comes with your membership as often they have partner properties or hidden gems that you may not have considered!

Further Reading

How to get out of helper mode

Thoughts

Do you find you are constantly looking out for opportunities to help people? Do you feel happiest when you’re able to help others, even when that helping others leaves you feeling depleted, exhausted, and frazzled? If so you’re not alone!

Society seems to value selfless over-giving and it needs to stop! Or at the very least there needs to be some balance- so that you can help where you can but you also learn to take a back seat sometimes and let other people help you!

Here’s how to get out of helper mode!

how to get out of helper mode, image of holding hands

At one point I gave up drinking alcohol because I always wanted to be there for everyone if they needed me. I was on call constantly, ever looking out for another way of coming to everyone’s rescue without thinking of the potential cost to me being available 24/7.

It never really occurred to me the potential impact it would have on those around me if I ended up in a crumpled heap due to putting everyone else’s needs first.

I’m not talking about being selfish, and never helping anyone ever again, but to consider pacing how much help you give so that you still have some personal battery left over for yourself and your own needs.

how to get out of helper mode. Image of a red first aid pouch being held up in someones hand

As a child I remember going to a local country show and taking with me a simple first aid kit. I felt powerful and useful and happy that if anyone needed a plaster I was there ready with one! I could help them. When I was at school and work I always had a range of painkillers, pads and tampons available for everyone else’s emergencies.

Maybe I wanted to do this so that I didn’t have to ask anyone else for a pad or a paracetamol or maybe I needed to be liked.

Maybe I felt I had little value without being in helper mode? Or perhaps I got so much praise for being a ‘good girl’ that I wanted more of that to make me feel worthy and worthwhile?

What do you gain from being in helper mode?

Can you think of why you’re constantly wanting to help people? Is it because really you need to be helped? Are you giving others what you need? What do you gain from always putting everyone else first? But also at what cost?

One of my friends was told to consider having ‘at what cost’ tattooed on her forearm. Now this is a bit extreme I grant you, but the point was that every time she tried to over help people, agree to helping people when her body and brain was screaming to say no, what cost did this bring?

Sometimes if we consider if we really do want to help or if we would be better off spending the time doing something we love, recharging our own batteries and resting we can then learn to say no to things.

Helping others, but at what cost?

The cost of over-giving and self-sacrifice could easily be burnout or for me to become a burden on others due to me not taking enough care of myself. If I don’t look after myself my body will grind to a halt and force me to stop. My bones will become weary.

In order for me to protect my ability to be useful to society I’m going to need to carefully curate my time and to decide what my priorities are so that I continue to have strength to support my friends and family and my clients.

how to get out of helper mode just say no image of a hand holding a pink post it note saying no on it

How do to get out of helper mode

Find other ways of getting the validation and praise you crave. Know that you’re a fabulous person even if you do decline helping that one particular person when you’re feeling overstretched. Metaphorically you need to put your own oxygen mask on first.

Decide on your longer-term goals and accept opportunities that take you nearer to meeting these goals.

Before agreeing to do something to help someone think carefully about what you truly want to do?

Do you really want to say no? Do you find it hard to say no? Are you afraid you will be seen as being mean, selfish, heartless or rude if you say no? If so you may need to practice saying no to smaller requests at first hen work up to the bigger ones!

Further reading

https://www.sarahcooper.co.uk/what-is-self-love/

https://www.sarahcooper.co.uk/what-is-self-care/

How to stop feeling overwhelmed

Thoughts

Do you feel overwhelmed?

Overwhelm often occurs when we have a heap of different urgent priorities all needing our attention all at once! It can be hard knowing where to start or what to tackle first.

What causes us to feel overwhelmed?

Sometimes we’re overwhelmed by the pressures of work or studying, family commitments, a messy and cluttered house, a sudden change in circumstances like a house move, redundancy, divorce or bereavement or maybe even a welcome, planned event like a wedding.

Just the very thought of what we need to do to sort out the problem can have us heading towards a panic attack or leave us having a sleepless night, night after night.

I know when my mother died and I was left to empty her house out, I sat at the kitchen table with my head in my hands and a strong cup of tea, wondering where on earth to start!

stop feeling overwhelmed. Image of a mug of tea and a notebook by a pretty window

Gather supplies and resources

Before you do anything, gather up supplies and resources.

This may include getting a notebook and pen to jot down ideas rather than having a myriad of bits of paper floating around!

It could be gathering up a selection of snacks and drinks to sustain you or clearing a space to work. The first thing I did when I started clearing out my mothers house was to create a patch where I could make coffee and tea and reheat soup. This made life a lot easier.

If you’re starting a desk based project it may be useful to clear your desk off before you begin so you’ve got a clear space to work.

If you’re decluttering you may need things like bin bags and cleaning products, or labels and storage boxes for things you’re planning on keeping.

If you’ve got a lot of documents which you need to have all to hand it may be useful to buy a display folder and pop them in the clear plastic wallets there.

You may want to make a list of the important tasks you need to do or to do some journaling to get all the thoughts, feelings and ideas you have out on paper thus making space in your head!

stop feeling overwhelmed have a good breakfast. Image of a full english breakfast on a white plate

Look after yourself first

Often if you’re feeling overwhelmed the last thing you want to do is eat big meals but having a protein rich breakfast can set you up for the day.

Drinking plenty of water, getting enough sleep if you possibly can and taking regular breaks are essential.

If you have a slow cooker it can be helpful to load something into that in the morning so you have a cooked meal to look forward to in the evening with not much extra effort.

stop feeling overwhelmed image of cluttered bed covered in clothes<br />

Where do you start?

When faced with a problem that seems overwhelming it can difficult knowing where to start! If you’re overwhelmed by a work issue, speak to your boss about what to prioritise and what to park up for now. This should reduce your workload a little bit.

If it’s a home based or personal project, work out what is going to be make the biggest impact and do that first.

If you’re decluttering, it can be useful to just simply pick somewhere to start. Good places to start are the smallest room or the room which will give the biggest impact, often this is either your bedroom, the bathroom or the kitchen.

If you’re not sure where to start decluttering in a room try gathering up one type of thing, so the rubbish, the laundry, the things that shouldn’t be in that room, any plates and cups, clothes etc. Once you’ve rounded up and processed one group of things, start on the next 🙂

Top Tip:
If you can’t get going, try setting a timer for 25 mins and tell yourself that after 25 mins you can stop if you want to!

It can be useful to run the timer again if you do stop so after 25 mins you get going again!

stop feeling overwhelmed enlist help of friends and family. image of friend giving friend a hand up<br />

Enlist the help of friends and family

One way to stop feeling overwhelmed is to enlist the help of other people either for moral support, practical help, advice, contacts and information or simply to spur you on when the going gets tough.

Have a think around your friendship circle. Who could you potentially ask for help?

Before you start to worry about whether you’d be bothering your friends, think how much pleasure you get out of helping other people 🙂

Often if you have someone helping you, you don’t feel as overwhelmed and have someone to bounce ideas off

Stop feeling overwhelmed. Image of pink fluffy parrot in a garden<br />

Be your own best friend

You’re probably wondering why on earth there’s a picture of a pink fluffy parrot? Well if you’re anything like me you’ll probably have a negative narrative constantly running in the background telling yourself that you’re rubbish and that you should be more able to cope with whatever life throws at you!

It is way more helpful if you can change the narrative to one of positivity. Be your own best friend, your own biggest advocate, your own biggest source of praise.

Be gentle on yourself. Instead of telling yourself how rubbish you are, how you can’t do this, how it’s too big, too scary, too much, too overwhelming, start telling yourself that you’ve got this, that you can do it, that you’re capable of getting through this and coming out the other side. This too will pass!

Take regular breaks and time out

When feeling overwhelmed it is important to keep taking regular breaks and time out. This will help you stay sane! Good things to do to stop feeling overwhelmed include going for a walk, listening to uplifting or calming music, or doing your hobbies.

Having a day off actively working on whatever is overwhelming you can also be helpful. When I was sorting out my mothers’ house I used to take Friday off so I could concentrate on something else. This used to mean I had the strength to keep on until the job was done!

Top Tip:

Try diffusing a calming essential oil blend like this one https://uk.nyrorganic.com/shop/sjcooper/product/2710/aromatherapy-blend-calming-10ml